“The Earth is the insane asylum for the universe”…and other quotes

Found these funny quotes on the net… the last one had me on the floor.

“Love is grand. Divorce is fifty grand.” – anon

 “Make it idiot proof and they’ll come up with a better idiot” – anon

“Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.” – anon

“What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick.” -Unknown

“I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.” -Steve Martin

“We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.” (Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks) 

  “It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.” (Former U.S. Vice-President Dan Quayle) 

“Britain is not an island…well, yes it is, but…”    – Unidentified MP, on BBC Radio 4

“President Union will address the nation on the state of the Bush.”     _ Hampton Pearson, news reporter, WBZ TV – from Paul Poznick (Andover, MA, USA)
 

“That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I’m just the one to do it.” (A congressional candidate in Texas)

“Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer.” -Swami X

To do is to be. (Descartes), To be is to do. (Voltaire), Do be do be do. (Frank Sinatra)

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One Response to ““The Earth is the insane asylum for the universe”…and other quotes”

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    […]“The Earth is the insane asylum for the universe”…and other quotes « Drunken Ruminations[…]…

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